selamanya

kuharap mentari pagi tak menyambut,
kuharap sinar rembulan tutup mataku,
selamanya..

sejak kau pergi,
tinggalkan bumi,
tinggal aku disini..

turunkan matahari,
usir bintang-bintang,
putarlah utara ke selatan.

untuk apa lagi semuanya,
ambillah jiwa retak ini,
ku tak ingin lagi.

putuskan hari-hari bumi,
aku ingin pergi,
menuju abadi,
selamanya..




hauntingly performed by,
anggun cipta sasmi

kedaimakan in remembrance feb '06 - dec '06

out of twisted fate and hopes for a better future, i was born
not a luxury but a necessity, not without a dream..but even dream failed you sometime

counting my blessing,
of knowing my dear friends are really my dear friends
of families and foes
of stress and joy

terima kasih from the bottom of my heart
a million thank you is not even close to pay you
to the people that i love
thank you, thank you and thank you

for those who's been visiting me, thank you for your continuous support
all good things come to an end
but you all are welcome to alor setar should you miss my mother's cooking

love,
kedaimakan...sob,sob

rm56.80

don't you guys just hate it when you think you are getting your pay tomorrow so you just want to spend the last coins in your pocket and to find out the money is not there as expected? well...this is another monthly routine for me and i'm sure few more millions people who live for their paycheck at the end of the month..and i just hate it.

so...what do i do with my last rm56.80 when i thought i'm getting my pay the next day? (in my case in the next 4 hours)

shopping! (yes, you can...just bring along your self employed friend that doesn't depend on the paycheck)

"never heard before brand" blue jeans = rm100
"cute brand but also never heard before" t-shirt = rm40
F.O.S rubber slipper = rm19.90
dinner = rm16.50

eh!..but you only got rm56.80 meh?
- confidently just ask your self employed friend to pay first because you are getting your pay in about 4 hours what..
7.00pm...excitedly queing in front of atm machine with 10metres of people lining up behind me
7.03pm...baki anda rm13.76
7.03 and 1/100th sec pm...frantically pressing the batal transaksi button

and this is what happened to the remaining rm56.80

spa treatment for me and my friend = rm40 (don't ask)
carwash = rm13
ramly burger for supper = rm2.50
and i still have balance!!

....and the next day arrived
waking up excitedly (just like when i was 9yo on the morning that we're going to kuala lumpur city during school break-to visit countless relatives from penang to perak to perak to perak to perak to gombak to sg penchala...then finally kuala lumpur [to me 22 years ago, kuala lumpur is a shopping mall, any shopping mall is kuala lumpur] )

9.15am maybank2u.com
9.16am baki anda rm13.76

bengonggggg! ( hence the photo that come with this post )

it's that time of the year again!!!

you all know how i don't really like my job right? but not wanting to sound ungrateful i do love what the job has done to my life so far. only now i began to understand god's plan for me.

but anyhow that dreadful bi annual stupid 'see who can make a proper horserace holding pattern in the air with typhoon durian coming from the east' is here again!!!!
and as usual i won't even be looking for the syllabus till its time to go for the CBT, (computer based training). and the CBT is like..1 day before the actual exam. arghhhh. got to borrow QRH (quick reference handbook...i think) from my friend as soon as i get out from my towel at 'way too late for the actual CBT programme started' 10.30am. hope he has updated his...(the authority have this craving to update its contents every 4 months or so-mine was last updated in 2001)

and once i manage to get through all this commotion, i'll sure vow ( vau, not vo ) to make my preparation 1 month ahead for the next exam. and i've been making this vow for the past 11 years to no avail. really is a wonder how the hell i make it through every 6 months since forever.

and all my close friends know how jittery i can get...they just despair to be in kl during my exam time. prefering to congratulate me at the end of the whole thing and do some lalalala celebration coz i think i deserve it..( for playing roullete see if i can pass without studying routine) .

and this year is no different than 1996,1997,1998,1999,2000,2001,2002,2003,2004,2005,2006,2007,2008,2009...tsk tsk tsk

-humongous SSIIGGGHHHHH.....